Life/death relationship

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A while ago it struck me big time that I’m going to die!!! It came out of nowhere and it has hit me like a lightening. I found myself in tears, shaking in fully blown panic attack. I have never experienced such shock, fear and terror in my entire life. I was very surprised because I didn’t know or even suspect it was there. I have my reassuring beliefs about life after death and I know the soul is eternal. What’s more for a very long time I was very nonchalant about death and wasn’t scared of it at all. I used to feel such pain that death seemed to be the only possible option of consolation and ending it. Things have changed now. I have changed… I love life and I enjoy living it. So where this terror is coming from? I still haven’t found the answer but it made me look at my relationship with life. Yes, that’s correct not with death but life. In my opinion when you’re scared of dying what’s really going on, you’re running away from life. I’ve worked with many people who needed to heal their relationship with life, seems like I’m next on the list, even though I’ve already changed it!

I know it’s only ego that can get scared of dying, for soul it’s just a passing to different form of life. What I know is that only ego can be scared to live and can limit and stop person from reaching his/her highest potential. Why it’s doing it? Simple, because it wants to exist. When you become your true self (higher self) = you reach your potential, the ego melts down like a snowflake on a first warm day. Ha! Before this happens, it then plots away to stay alive and strong. What I’m experiencing is ego’s fight to stay alive and kicking!

What I did was the following: I faced the fear and terror and once they burned trough me I just loved the ego and embraced it even more. I treated it like a small child who got lost in the dark wood. No, I didn’t bash it with the stick or numb it to submission. One thing you need to know when dealing with ego, any ego: it’s like a bomb – very delicate and somewhat dangerous, so you need to be very careful when disarming it. In my own experience the best way to do it is to love it till it surrenders and stops fighting back. The moment you try to fight it it grows and gets stronger, so there’s no use in such approach. Just love it and embrace it.

Once the ego was in my loving embrace I asked it what benefits this whole game of I’m afraid to live was giving me. Then I asked what was the ultimate price I was paying for ego’s service. I thanked it and sent it more love. Afterwards, I asked my Higher Self, my guides and angels to simply heal the ego right to the core of the fear and then to evolve it all. I checked if there were no beliefs lurking from behind which supported that old fear. I removed and replaced them with the healthy ones. Then I had a word with internal saboteur. This powerful archetype is in place to show you ways in which you undermine yourself. Once I had the information I needed I made a decision to stop limiting myself and I chosen to grow further and connect with life stronger yet without clinging to it at the same time. Finally I gave thanks to all for their help and support and expressed my gratitude for what is. Simple. You can use this process too! I’d love if you do that and let me know what was your experience.

Life and death are same, just a reverse of one another. Just like when you flip coin and get heads or tail, you can flip life and on the other side is death and vice versa. So yes, I’ll die one day, everybody will, that’s the only known and very certain thing about the future. It’s my job then to live this life to the full and enjoy it as much as I’d like, to shape it and make it to what’s for my highest good and most of all to embrace it with all of its shadows and magnificence. This, I believe, is also your job. So go on, investigate what’s your relationship with life/death, how you limit yourself and make a choice to change it. Meet me on the other side of the rainbow – I’ll be waiting or if you need someone who’s been trough it to hold your hand during this passage, juts give me a shout. I’ll be more then happy to help you.




Photo credit: h.koppendelaney